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November 5, 2012 / Andee Frizzell

Spanish Vocabulary

My Friend Mark is learning to speak Spanish. A noble enterprise at forty-five I might add. He’s taken on this task because his husband is from Columbia and Mark hopes to speak to Juan Camilo’s family or at least be able to translate what Juan says under his breath when he’s angry with him.

Juan Camilo, delighted by the endeavour  offered to help Mark with his vocabulary. He told Mark he was going to put a few yellow post-its on everyday items around the apartment with a Spanish name printed on it so as to aid Mark in word association.

I went over for dinner the other night and the apartment looks like a huge yellow ticker tape parade passed through it. There wasn’t an object void of a name tag. I laughed as I strolled through the apartment trying to pronounce the Spanish words written on every visible surface.

“El clinex? Seriously!”  I said as I walked into the kitchen where Mark was bent over reaching into the oven to take out the pizza’s.

I noticed a yellow post-it stuck to his butt. “Mark, what’s a conjin?”

“It’s a cushion. Why?”

“That’s appropriate,” I said “Cos you have a note stuck to your ass that says cojin.”

“Shut up.” he whirled around and picked the offensive item from his rear. “Juan got so excited; he went a bit over board with these. Likely it wasn’t this one,” he pointed to the oven, “el horno.”

I was imagining Juan putting a post-it on the toilet paper roll, paper higienico and was about to mention this ridiculous scenario to Mark when I remembered I had used the Loo when I first came into the apartment. I couldn’t remember there being one but then again I was desperate for a whiz and wasn’t really paying attention.

If there WAS a note on the wipe….what happened to it?

Mierda!

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